Tuesday, January 31, 2006

I'm On A Mission...

...to find out who I really am. I want to know who I am.

My best friend K and I were talking briefly yesterday about knowing who we really are. She mentioned some things that the Lord had revealed to her and it was similar to what I have been thinking about lately as well. While these things might not be exactly what the Lord spoke to her about, I feel that maybe the Lord was using her and her revelations to nudge me as well.

So, I need to find out who I really am. Yes, I am a daughter of the King, a follower of Jesus the Christ, but this is more than that. I mean, I hear of people being passionate about someone or something or a particular cause - I don't know what, if anything, I am passionate about. I have things I like or really like, but is it strong enough to say that I am passionate about it? I don't know. I don't feel that I am passionate about anything, so I am praying for the Lord to give me a passion about something. Now, before I go on, you may be thinking "We just need to be passionate about the Lord." Well, I am - maybe not as much as I should be, and maybe this is where I need to concentrate and put all my energies.

I am not really talking about this passion. It is more about other passions. For example, I know of a woman at my church (she is also a prof at school, though I don't have her for any classes) and she is passionate about poverty and women's rights/issues, that sort of thing. She is VERY passionate about these things and she is active in these issues. I am not comparing myself to this woman (or anyone else), but I wonder who do I get passionate about something, or what do I get passionate about?

There are so many causes and such 'out there' that people are passionate about, that they are striving to end or make others aware of something. There are so many people fighting for, say breast cancer. That is great and I applaud them. It's not something that I would like to see any woman get or have to deal with, and I support it wholeheartedly (the research, the finding a cure, etc.)...but I'm not passionate about it. The same goes for so many things. I might believe in the cause and support it, but I'm not passionate about it.

What does this have to do with finding out who I am? Well, by finding out who I am I might be able to discover something that I am passionate about, something that I am not willing to give up on or let someone try to deter me from doing something about...does that make sense?

I am not even sure where or how to begin at finding out who I am. How can I serve Him and know Him if I don't even know me. It is something I have begun to pray about, asking the Lord to give me a passion, to help me find out who I am (and that might include finding out negative things like selfishness or something which I need to change so that I am not like that)...I fear this is one of those "it's going to take a long time to discover" things, or "what if I find out that I don't like who I am, or that I am not the woman I thought I was?" things. I guess only time and the Lord will tell. I've just started this process, so I don't have any answers yet but if I continue and honestly seek to find out who I am, I am sure He will reveal things to me.

My questions to you are:

1. Do you know who you are?
2. How did you find this out?
3. Do you have something you are passionate about, if so how did you develop it?
4. What does one do to search at finding out who he/she is?


Maggie Ann said...

Hi Shelley, the only two things that come quickly to my mind about being passionate is the command to love God with all of our hearts and to love others as ourselves. Seeking thier good and thier salvation. Those are my two things I wish to be passionate about, with all else taking a back seat. Its an up and down road as we travel through this world, but Jesus said, I will never leave thee nor forsake thee. What a joy of a comfort that is to my soul...And...by the way, we used to use Lysol liquid cleaner all the time when our kids were little. It has a unique smell...lol, I think I like the lavender better...smile. Happy day to you!

Pilot Mom said...

Wow, Shelley, great post and great questions for us to think about.

I have to say I think what one is passionate about grows out of their passion for Christ. Within that passion for Him He will lead you into areas of service which may develop into a passion.

I've not given this much thought so my answer is off the top of my head. I would have to say besides being passionate about my marriage and family....I'm passionate for sharing Christ with my mormon friends and whoever the Lord brings across my path.

I wonder...don't you think a passion develops over a period of time? I know mine has. And, it's kind of funny because I'm a VERY shy person. So to think of me out sharing the gospel message with strangers, or even friends who could then reject me, is unnerving. However, I have found Him more than faithful in standing with me during my sharing.

I'll give this more thought! Thanks!

HeyJules said...

Shelley, a couple of things...

First, go over to visit Gina's blog at www.refreshmentrefuge.blogspot.com. She's doing an entire series on spiritual gifts, passions, etc. and its excellent.

Also, sometimes I think our passions are developed over time. I got into being passionate about the AIDS crisis when someone I knew really well died from it. These kinds of experiences tend to turn your heart to them and they become your passion because of the memories tied to the causes.

I'm still looking for all my answers but I have discovered that writing - particularly about how God works in my life - is my passion. I suspect yours might lie there as well...

Jennifer said...

Great post, and great comments!
My passion is for the Native American people, specifically the Lakota Sioux. This came about because of my studies in Anthropology, which revealed to me the many atrocities these people have endured. Sadly, much of it was at the hand of so-called Christians. It is my heart's desire to heal the wounds caused by those people, and to show the Native Americans the true authentic Jesus. I wrote about this last summer, but I can't remember if you were reading then.

I also agree wholeheartedly with Ann, that following the command to love the Lord and love our neighbors is the first priority. In other words, we shouldn't get involved in some big issue if we can't show love to those around us every day.

Maria del Carmen said...

I don't think it has to involve a well-known cause to count as passion. I am totally passionate about encouraging people who are down. For instance, I like to make them laugh and bring them up and share my testimony in a conversational way. People with addictions, mental issues, baggage...bring 'em on!

Darlene said...

I bet that the paths that you are on are all leading in one direction, and when they come together then you will see. For me at this point in my life it's writing, and everything I've been doing in the past ten years has groomed me for this, but I didn't know it until it came together just this year. I hope you find your passion soon. I love your spirit of hunger.

*~Tey~* said...

I really understand where you're coming from. I have asked myself and God this many times 'Who am I, what's your plan for me, God?' There are plenty things that I like, but not many things I'm passionate about. I thought that maybe it was something God would re-veal to me over time and when I became more 'serious' about God.

I pray to God and jesus and ask for Jesus to give me a burning passion in my heart for Jesus. I'll just keep trying to build myself to be hungry for God. Atleast then I'll be really passionate about God. That's my main priority at the moment.

I also think that slowly things become a passion. YOu don't wake up one morning and say "I have a passion for this". I would say it's a gradual thing that builds.

God bless you!

Jayleigh said...

1. I know who I am for now, but I am always growing and changing.

2. I prayed for 3 whole years that the Spirit guide my feet to the path God wants me to take. I ALWAYS knew that I needed to "help people" and that just wasn't happening in my safe, quiet life of working retail at The Pharmacy.

Some friends did "40 Days of Purpose" and around the same time, there was a Hospice Volunteer training class being offered locally. I had NO clue what I was going to do for Hospice. I knew they were a great organization, but it wasn't yet my passion.

Also, I was asked to help out at the local food bank around the same time, back in 2003. It was supposed to be just a few times, but now I am there every Wednesday.

With Hospice, I have had 3 main patients who've passed on. My time with my most recent patient is chronicled on my blog in the series called "Observations from the Flowery Chair."

My point is, I prayed for a long time. I listened when God spoke to me, even if I thought it was crazy.

And both things literally HIT me on the head. I didn't go looking for them.

Look for ways to serve. That's my advice.

Jezreel said...

Oh my dear lady, what is it that you would dread to have taken away from you?

1. Do you know who you are?
Yes, yes I do.
2. How did you find this out?
I read the Bible.
3. Do you have something you are passionate about, if so how did you develop it?
I am passionate about Israel and the Jewish people. I found this passion after going to Israel.
4. What does one do to search at finding out who he/she is?
Read your Bible, my dear. You are a chosen one - called out - a disciple of Christ.

Bonnie Calhoun said...

Do I know who I am....I'm usually wandering around like I am lost, but yes I do know who I am...I'm a King's kid(thanks to our Lord), I'm a mother...thanks to..(oh never mind. I'm a seamstess and a writer (both of those thanks to the Lord for giving me the gifts)

How did I find this out....one day I woke up and...poof...it was all there. No...really...I'm 56 years old this year. I gave up sewing as an occupation in my 20's and didn't come back to it until ten years ago...It's a passion. Writing I picked up about the same time...it has grown into a passion.

To find out what your passion is...look at the things you like to do...do them and enjoy them...someday, something will strike you...and you'll realize you love doing it. Don't force it, that's not passion, that's compulsion.

If you notice I didn't equate 'a passion' with God. God isn't my passion, God is my life. A passion is something that you love and adore doing, but you don't necesarrily shrivel up and die without the ability to do it...Without God I would shrivel up and die. Do you understand where I'm going?

God wants nothing but good things for us. He wants to bless us with the desires of our hearts (as long as they line up with His word) As long as you are following the Lord don't be afraid to desire good gifts. God delights in us and what we do.

Paula said...

Oh my friend, I struggle with those same issues. I believe our passion is where we are in that particular moment in time. I'm a wife, mother and friend, so I need to be as passionate about my family as I can be. It doesn't sound as glamorous as other people's passions, but they're mine nonetheless.


Nettie said...

Hmm, my passions I think came about more or less by accident. That is, I started them, and they just grew.

Bonnie Calhoun said...

Shelley, my friend Mimi has started a new Bible study. She's doing Acts chapter 8...drop by..:


Paul said...

Hi Shelley,

You have really given us a lot to think about!

What is my passion? I would say, considering all that I have gone through in the last three years with the chemotherapy and radiation treatments, two major surgeries (I am cancer free) and a divorce (not by choice) after 29 years, I was pretty much been stripped of everything.

During that time, I was what I like to call "Him In" by the Lord, where for three years I had lots of time to think, to ponder, to wonder and to get to know the Lord anew, fresh and learn what my passion was and that passion is to be a pen in the hand of the Father, for He birthed Hill Counry Thoughts, it is His gift to me.

I know, that the life I live now, I truly lived for the Lord, that it is no longer I that liveth, but Christ that liveth in me. That it is not mere words, but has become a reality in my life.

How did I find it out, by the things that I have gone through, not that everyone has to go through this, but the Lord loved me enough to allow me to go through this because He knew it would bring me to Him and that He would carry me through the dark nights of the soul, through the tears, through the valleys and to the mountain tops also.

I am passionate about writing, in a conversational way, of simply sharing the reality of what He has done and is doing in my life.

In the Lord I found who I was, as I began to look to Him, for it is truly in His presence that we see who were are. Real people, living in a real world, sharing about a living Lord.

In His presence I have found out what it means to love with His love, to see with His eyes and to hear His heart beat, to be attune to His passion through us to others.

Truly my passion has become the Lord, from saviour to Lord of my life, for when all is say and done, it is all about Him!

Thank you for sharing Shelley, for stirring the passion in others.

I think you may be surprised, I don't think it is going to take as long as you think, to discover who you are. His desire is to reveal Himself to you and often times it is in the still small voice :)

Be blessed my friend,

Writing for the King,


Darlene said...

I'm thinking of you today. Hope you're doing well.

*~Tey~* said...

Hi. It's Tey. You will know mw from hhtp://www.somethingsobeautiful.blogspot.com/. As you might of already realized this blog has been deleted. Yes every post from the last year is gone. My blog was discovered by some people who I would of rathered never find out and who demanded I discontinue blogging. Anyway, I have become almost untraceable so this does not happen in the future. You can still read my posts at http://www.somethingsoverybeautiful.blogspot.com/, however I will not be using real names of people or places or anything that people can link to being me. You may have to change your links again. Sorry, I know my links have changed a bit lately. Oh and if you go to http://www/kristyslivejournal.blogspot.com/ (which is my old, old blog) which was is deleted please ignore it. Somebody that does not like me has set up a blog in this place that is not very nice. So please ignore anything that you might of read on that site. I am currently communicating with blogger to see if we can get it deleted.

Thanks guys!

Joe said...

Good questions...not easy ones...but good ones.

I suspect that there are really few people who have a level of passion about something that sets them apart.

Col. Sanders, Bill Gates, Spurgeon, Billy Graham...those are people whose passion set them apart.

Most of us never get there.

But at a somewhat more modest level many do.

Do you read "Sweeter Than Ever" at http://sweeterthanever.com/

There is a passion style that we could all strive for.

Dorothy said...

There are no easy answers, m'dear.... I hate myself for sounding like my momma right now, but maybe she was onto something.

My dear Jayleigh did not know what she was passionate about, and I always did. Does that mean my life was any easier? Nope. It really sucked because then, as now, I've never felt like I was good enough.

Just pray, sweetie. I'll pray for you too. He will speak to you (perhaps in a very subtle way) and you will know it in your heart.