Ok, well I was just going to post a short note saying that I believe your prayers are working regarding my cold/allergies. I've taken only a couple of cold pills and my symptoms are not really there now...so I believe I am better :o) thanks for the prayers!
Now, last night I was feeling very very stressed out over Hebrew. I hadn't looked at it since last April when school was done. Didn't know they'd be doing an Advanced Hebrew course so I didn't bother to keep up with it. Now I wish I had known so that I could have. We have our first test next week and I am soooo unprepared for it. I'm forgetting things, can't recognize verbs, etc. I can recognize mostly if it is feminine/masculing, singular/plural...but can't always recognize what verb it is. So, naturally me being me I began to panic and get rather upset. I was on the verge of tears thinking "what have I got myself into!" and such things.
Well, I decided after an hour to put it away since I was in no frame of mind to be able to try to translate and I instead tried to focus on God. It was hard. I put on a CD and listned to "Days of Elijah" for 1/2 hour straight...nothing other than that song. Only reason I picked that song was because it was the only one I hadn't heard in awhile and felt like listening to. Anyway, somewhere along the line I was able to take the focus off of myself and put it on God. I went to bed and prayed after the 1/2 hour. I poured out my heart to God, told Him the fears I was having recently regarding school and after I am finished with school, getting into the Education program, etc. Now, here is basically what He said to me (mind you it's a loose paraphrase as I didn't actually hear a voice...but you get the point):
"Ok Shelley, you remember that story you wrote that is being published, the one about Luggage Larry? Honey, unpack your suitcase."
So, guess what I did. I unpacked my suitcase and gave Him my worries and fears. I felt less stressed this morning (which was really when I did this) and most of the day. I found that there were a few times when I had to unpack my suitcase again and again.
I say all this to say that there seems to be a message that God is trying to give me. First there is what I just mentioned, and secondly today and yesterday I have run across a couple of verses that I believe God is wanting me to recall and use in my life. They are:
Matthew 6:33 "But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." as well as Matthew 7:7 "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you."
I believe God is telling me that I need to seek Him in everything. He needs to be first in my life, ahead of school, family, myself and so on. I need to ask Him, seek Him. I need to give Him my problems and struggles, focus on Him and allow Him to work His plan. Whatever happens after I am done my BA (if I get accepted or not into the education program), how I'll do in Hebrew, and the list goes on...these all need to be given to Him and I need to put my trust in Him that He knows what He is doing.
Basically, I need to give God back the control of my life. I need to include Him in every aspect, in decisions, studying, etc. I need to stop trying to do it on my own. I need to stop worrying so much and stressing out. I need to do my best and if I only get a C+ instead of a B+ it's ok because I did my best. You see, I'm one of these people who feel that if I don't get a B- or higher (preferably higher) then I must be dumb. I think that might be a pride issue, but not sure.
So, that is what God has been telling me the last few days. It's going to be hard to do, but I have to do it, and it will probably be one of those on going daily things...probably have to do this several times a day. But the good thing is, God is in control!
Have a blessed and glorious Christ filled day!