Well, prayer meeting was tonight. I want to thank all who prayed for me. I got up and spoke, was VERY nervous (though I was told that I didn't sound nervous at all - my voice didn't shake or anything), and intimidated because instead of there being about 10 like the associate pastor told me usually attends, there were about 40!
I messed up, and I don't think I did good at all. I sat down and wanted to bawl my eyes out, and a few tears did escape (though I caught them before they could fall down my face). I felt awful and humiliated and felt like I wouldn't be able to show my face at prayer meeting again (course I didn't want to show my face at church either). The pastor got up after me, thanked me and agreed that it was a hard Psalm to work with, especially on such short notice (with not much time to prepare). I let him take over and he gave a much better talk.
People came up to me after though and told me I did a great job, told me I was courageous and they could never do that, said I stepped out of my box, etc. The president of the university I went to (he's also a pastor) was there (he goes to my church) and he came up to me and told me I did great, that I included everything I should have - context, application and said not to stop doing that but to keep up with it, keep practicing. He said I have a real gift for teaching, so that was nice to hear.
I let everyone know that I had never done anything like that before and how nervous I was. I also told them that the passage was a hard one to work with, and when the pastor got up to take over he told them it was extremely difficult and that it's not one that you would normally pick to work with in situations like this.
Afterwards, he (the pastor) came over and thanked me and said that he's going to get me to do it again sometime and I sort of reluctantly agreed but told him to give me more notice next time. He agreed that it was on short notice, and that contributed to the fear and stuff.
The comments that some of the people gave me were nice and encouraging. Some of them I don't know if they were honest or if they were just trying to be nice, but I do know that the university president would not lie about something like that. He would give constructive criticism, but he would not tell you that you did good if you really didn't. So, from him I take encouragement from his words, and that's a nice feeling. I do appreciate the kind words people had to say.
I know I didn't do the best at it, and I made sure they knew it was my first time doing that sort of thing, the passage was hard, etc., so I think they were somewhat understanding. Anyway, if the pastor does follow through, I'll be doing another one some time and hopefully I will improve a great deal on it.
At least now I can relax for awhile...