Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Post-Christmas Post

Well, Christmas is over and I think it went well. I made it to church and enjoyed the service (the pastor spoke on John 1 about Jesus being with God and was God in the beginning, and how He was made flesh and dwelled among us). There were several people there, but not as many as I had thought might be - though I do know several families were away so they obviously weren't going to be there, and I am sure there were some who just didn't want to attend for various reasons.

My family gathered together after church (I was the only one who went) and had our dinner when I got home and before we could really finish eating (we didn't even get to the pie) before my little nephew started rummaging through the presents wanting to open them. It was great fun though watching him open all his gifts.

Since Christmas I have really felt the desire to have children yet again. It was really strong on Christmas day at church when they had a baby dedication for a little girl who was probably only a couple of weeks old. It actually brought tears to my eyes, not because I was jealous or because it was overly touching (though I always like the baby dedications). No, the desire I had was so strong that I was wishing it were me up there having my baby dedicated.

I think that these feelings might be being triggered because my birthday is coming up and I'll be 37 and still unmarried. I just feel like I'm getting old and my time for having kids is running out. I know God has a plan for my life, but I don't know if it involved being married and having kids, and that is what is scary. I know his plan is for the best for me, but it can get hard at times not knowing.

I'm not feeling pity for myself or anything like that, and in fact I've been better since then; however, the desires are still there and I'm trying to give it all to God and let him control the situation...but again, that is hard.

Anyway, change of topic. One of the gifts I got my nephew for Christmas was a sweater that I made for him. I finished it up Christmas Eve Day, and everyone seemed to like it. Here is a picture I took of the sweater. Some people were asking to see a picture of it when I was done, so here is the long promised picture of the sweater...

It's made from Lion Brand Homespun (I think that's what it's called) yarn, and it is very soft and warm. It was easy to work with and I used 6.5mm needles and it knit up quite fast. I just hope I tied all the ends tight enough and with the right knot so that it doesn't fall apart lol. That's my big fear is that I'll make something for someone and they'll wash it and it will end up falling apart.

Anyway I have to get up early again for work tomorrow. Not sure how much longer I'll be going in - depends on the workload, if it dwindles down like it always does after Christmas, it wouldn't surprise me if I only work the rest of this week. We'll see. I'd like some time to myself over the break to do nothing but relax before going back to school and I will probably get it, just not sure how soon it will start. So, I will head off now and get a little knitting done before I head off to bed to get up early.

Have a Christ filled day!!


Pia said...

shelly, i understand your desire. i feel that too. just keep on praying and i will pray for you too.

Live, Love, Laugh said...

God knows the desires of your heart, but it will be in His time and apparently He is molding you for His purpose now, not your will, but His.

Wow the sweater is so cute.

God Bless you Shelley!!!!

Jezreel said...

Awwwww Shelley (((((hugs))))) I feel for you!! Will be praying for God to show you His will in your life. Love ya!

Oh and that is an awesome job you did on that sweater!

Love Jez

mreddie said...

God hears the cry of our hearts and His Word does say that as we delight in Him, He gives us our heart's desires.

Like the sweater - I'm not sure I would have the patience for that, and if I did try it, it would probably look like a large potholder. :) ec

Katie said...

Hey Shelley,

Glad to hear your Christmas was fun, and little ones always help in that department.

I'm with LLL on her comment, but i know what you're feeling. Desires and patience are a tough combination, and it is a DAILY battle that we all face. I'll be praying for you sweet girl, and know that you are not alone in that place of waiting.

Becky said...

Hi Shelley...are you enjoying your break? I have hardly had a chance to 'rest' yet from exams but hopefully, now that the hustle and bustle of christmas are over, I'll have a chance to catch up on the cleaning, shopping, sleep etc. that I didn't get done during school. Also, my son is enjoying just hanging with mommy! How did you do on your exams? I know you said in an earlier blog that you felt you didn't do as well as the previous terms. I felt that way too but then it turned out I did better than I had thought! Have an awesome New Year and keep in touch.

Maggie Ann said...

Shelley, I love being able to see the picture of the beautiful sweater you knit. You did a terrific job! I haven't knit anything for quite a long time but I 'll pick up those knitting needles again, I just know it. *smile* I like your color combination too. You have a tender heart, God bless you Shelley! Saying a prayer for you. Hope your school break is relaxing and peaceful. Happy New Year wishs coming your way from me!

Ruth said...

hi shelley! your sweater is lovely!! great job!! as for faith - yea, it is difficult. but trust that He knows what is best for you and the blessings He has in store for you are more than you can ever imagine! He loves you! *hugs* =)

Dorothy said...

A wonderful sweater, and a gift from the Heart! (Jayleigh made me the most awesome ... er... "Superwoman Cape"... at least that's what I call it).

I totally hear you about having kids. After my 10-year marriage ended, and there were no kids, it seemed like a blessing. I'm sure it was.

Yesterday though, I cried bitterly that there's no little one in my life. Hugs sweetie. I believe that God will show each of us the right time for mommy-hood.


Ruth said...

hi shelley!
thanks for the compliments on my cabled scarf! the pattern is actually on my blog - if you look at the original post, there's a link to the pattern underneath the pictures.
also, here's some help on cables:
(look under decorative stitches and click on the video icon)
hope that helps!! =)

purple_kangaroo said...

Beautiful job on the sweater!